When things go wrong with a housemate

People who share a rental property may experience conflict in their relationships with housemates. It can be difficult sharing space with other people, especially if you didn’t know each other before moving in together. If tension happens, take a step back and breathe. Ask yourself some questions:

• Was it intentional?
• Was any harm done?
• Is it likely to happen again?
• Should I discuss the issue or let it go?

It’s okay to be upset, disappointed, or angry. It shows care and maturity to want to make the relationship with your housemate better. It might help to get support from the University’s Student Counselling service.

It’s never acceptable to threaten anyone with any type of harm, to be a bully, to intimidate or physically hurt a roommate, or to destroy their personal belongings. If you experience any type of harmful behaviour, you can call the police on 000 or contact one of our confidential and supportive caseworkers for assistance.

Common issues of conflict between housemates

1. Cleanliness

We all have different standards of cleanliness. It’s reasonable to raise concerns about keeping common spaces like the kitchen and living room clean and tidy. Compromise is essential when living with others. Consider if you can be a bit tidier, or more relaxed about mess. Try to have patience with the person you’re living with. Another option, if you can agree on rules or a cleaning roster, is to set up areas of the house that need to be kept clean and tidy and determine who is responsible and when. Your agreement states tenants must keep the property reasonably clean, and this also prevents your landlord claiming a professional cleaning cost from your bond when you leave.

2. Sleep

Compromise is going to work the best in these situations, so figure out a way in which you can both get what you want. Ultimately, adequate sleep is personal to each person but is essential to all of us. If you stay up late and your housemate goes to bed early, be kind and understanding of the other, and try and be as quiet as possible when you are awake.

3. Partners and friends who stay the night

Communicate with your housemate. If you plan on having company, it is courteous to let your housemate know in advance and be respectful of their needs and right to enjoy their home.

Occasionally a partner’s or friend’s behaviour or presence may cause conflict in the household. This person is a guest and not on the rental agreement and housemates have a responsibility to consider each other’s positions. Guests are not obliged to pay rent, however it is always good for partners and friends to be respectful of the space, clean up after themselves and be aware of the other housemate’s needs for privacy and quiet.

4. Bills

Are you or your housemate consistently late in paying bills? Is the disagreement about the levels of contribution? The easiest method for deciding contribution is to split up the bills fairly and evenly. If you have a partner who stays overnight a lot, it is reasonable for the partner to make a small contribution especially if you all share meals. If bills are consistently paid late a household may want to set up autopayments through one person’s bank account, with all other housemates paying their share before the payment is deducted from the account. Different housemates can take responsibility for autopayments for each household bill, so autopayments are shared evenly.

5. Rent payment

At the start of sharing a rental property, decide who gets which room and for what amount of rent. Agree on a method for paying rent and when. Many housemates set a deadline for rent and nominate one person to collect and transfer on behalf of the household to ensure rent is paid in full and on time. It can get messy if each tenant has different times and does their own transfer. If you collect rent from your housemates, always give receipts. For electronic transactions clearly label the transaction as rent and include the date range. Make sure the person who transfers the full rent shares the rent payment receipt with all housemates.

Your legal obligations

If you and your housemate/s signed a residential tenancy agreement you are jointly responsible for the payment of rent and household bills, the maintenance of the property, and complying with the conditions in the agreement. Legally you are co-tenants. There are specific tenancy laws if one or all housemates want to end an agreement in a share house. Find out your legal rights and responsibilities.

Disclaimer

This information is current as at November 2024 and where it includes legal information is intended as a guide to the law as it applies to people who live in or are affected by the law as it applies in NSW. It does not constitute legal advice.

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Written by SUPRA Postgraduate Advocacy Service and Legal Service November 2024.